Valid – ElPropósito6 min de lectura

What we accept as unquestionable

"The only rules are the ones dictated by the laws of physics. Everything else is a recommendation" (Elon Musk). Walter Isaacson’s biography of Elon Musk (Isaacson also wrote the books on Steve Jobs and Leonardo da Vinci) is keeping me company as I start January 2024. I am amazed by the many stories surrounding someone I admire for his tenacity and, above all, his ability to endure even the worst moments of his life. As a child he went through very cruel experiences that marked him for the rest of his life, yet at a certain point he made a decision and took control of the future he wanted. I open this post with that line because it made me reflect. What do we accept as valid without questioning it? What do we simply take for granted as the way things are, with no way of changing them? What has someone else dictated that we never question, not even to test whether it is true?

I am Catholic (unlike Musk), and to his line I would add the Ten Commandments of God’s law 😇. Back to the main point: we often drift away from living our life purpose because we don’t know it and have never set out to ask ourselves what it is, and also because we are unaware that we are living someone else’s purpose. Which of the two scenarios should make us reflect more? The line attributed to Mark Twain is one of my favorite ways to answer that question: the two most important days in a person’s life are the day they are born and the day they find out why. So knowing our purpose in this life is almost an obligation. How does this connect to the opening line?

The great tool we all carry inside is our life purpose. In my case, it is my main way of questioning what I want to do or what I am thinking. It is the lighthouse that lights my way so I know whether something is right or not, and it gives me the ethics and morals I want to live by (I admit I am far from flawless and nowhere near a saint). The word that resonated with me when I read Musk’s line was "recommendation." How often do we go looking for recommendations when we already have the answer? How often do we doubt our ability to use reason and make a decision? Why do we look for some kind of validation before deciding? Much of the determination of a person or a team comes from being clear from the start about why they are doing what they are doing or are about to do. The big problem with not knowing that why is that we will always be ready to ask someone else for their mere recommendations.

Are recommendations bad? Definitely not. I grew up hearing a saying that goes roughly like this: "whoever won’t listen to advice won’t live to grow old." I am clear that wisdom is made of maturity, accumulated experience and the lessons learned from it, so there are moments in life when advice will always be welcome. What cannot happen is seeking advice 365 days a year. How and why does this happen? Because we are surrounded by a great many limiting beliefs, and once we become aware of them we see they are simply recommendations. Very few of us are willing to break the status quo or question it. What does that achieve? Quite simply, it creates new things and a better future for ourselves and for humanity. Humanity’s greatest achievements came from questioning the status quo and refusing to accept what was preestablished as valid. I firmly believe that much of what is preestablished, and that overregulates our freedoms as human beings, comes from someone who never had a clear life purpose and accepts as valid something that is not aimed at letting others develop their full abilities and faculties either.

A core principle in quality, excellent coaching is that we coaches do not give recommendations. We fully trust that through coaching we can partner with our clients so they discover an answer better than ours. We know that a client who seeks coaching is ready and prepared to receive it and is at a point in life where they want to discover their own answers. That is where coaching shows its greatest benefit. I am clear that there are moments and situations when we literally need advice, a recommendation, a concrete point of view or a guideline to know what to do. There are moments and moments in our lives. So how many answers do we hold within ourselves, beyond someone else’s recommendations?

Warm regards and all the best,

Rodrigo Baccaro

P.S. This week’s VELA:

• What I was watching: Javier Milei’s full speech at Davos. Milei is someone else I admire and have followed for a long time. He opened the door for me to many liberal libertarian authors, such as Alberto Benegas Lynch (h) (Autopsia del socialismo), Murray Rothbard (The Ethics of Liberty) and Carl Menger, among many others I have enjoyed reading and, above all, learning from.
  – What I was listening to: No condicionaré mis decisiones políticas a cambio de una visa (I will not trade my political decisions for a visa). An interview with Álvaro Arzú (son), another figure I admire for his tenacity and, above all, his political convictions.
  – What I was reading: Elon Musk by Walter Isaacson. A great book to start the year with. I recommend it 100%.
  – What I was learning: Carajillo. How to make this wonderful cocktail.
• I have two tools that help me in many ways to run my life, and I sum them up in two Spanish acronyms: REMO (oar) and VELA (sail). REMO gives me a rhythm of four activities that are in my hands to do and bring me great benefits: R for Rezar (pray), E for Ejercitarme (exercise), M for Meditar (meditate) and O for Organizar (organize) my day. VELA is what someone else has created that brings me knowledge or a different way of seeing life: V for Ver (watch), E for Escuchar (listen), L for Leer (read) and A for Aprender (learn). Without planning it, I realized over time that both the oar and the sail are used on boats, and it was lovely to see that my life is a boat guided by God, the Virgin Mary and a personal compass, my Life Purpose. I hope this is useful, and if it is, share your experiences with me. Hugs.

Author: Rodrigo Baccaro

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