Words – ElPropósito4 min de lectura

The art of silence

"Good makes no noise; noise does no good." I came across this adage today while reading the Gospel of the day, and it struck me like a sword, revealing how much words matter at the right moment and how much silence matters at every moment of life. Silence is not easy to master. It is an art that, once mastered, lets us see things from another angle, another perspective. Perhaps silence’s greatest gift is that it starts us on the path toward doing good. I constantly see how that one second of silence between what we hear and what we hold back creates a deeper connection with other people. How do we develop listening? What do we need in order to listen twice as much as we speak?

Much of a coach’s work is listening attentively while holding a silence so unique and so revealing that it tells them when to ask their client a question, and what to ask, after the client has spoken. That is why I like the first part of the adage so much, "good makes no noise." Our words often create noise in the other person. Many people come to us to be listened to attentively, to be understood in one way or another as they face big challenges. Our responsibility, then, is to ask ourselves whether this is the moment to make noise (talking for the sake of talking) or simply to listen so we know how to respond, whether with a question to keep understanding or by staying silent.

Silence and listening are the greatest gift we can give. I believe that if we want to do good, we can do it by listening, and if we want to do greater good, we can listen attentively, to understand, to go beyond the words, with no thought of preparing our reply. Listening is within our control, within our circle of influence. Yet it is so complex and hard to master precisely because listening is tied to the ego. To listen, we must switch off the ego. Here I quote Marcus Aurelius in his Meditations: "From Rusticus I learned to read carefully and not be satisfied with a rough understanding of the whole, and not to agree too quickly with those who have a lot to say about something."

In a world of information overload, I believe a person’s greatest competitive advantage is and will be the ability to listen, the ability to say more with fewer and fewer words. The wise are never known by their words, only by their deeds. So what is the greatest act of love and charity we can offer while investing nothing more than switching off our ego? Listening. How should we read the second half of the opening line, "noise does no good"? It is interesting how a badly tuned song, or one played too loud, can distort any setting. So I ask myself: how does a string of misplaced words, in a conversation that called for silence and active listening, differ from that song played out of tune and too loud? It doesn’t. Both are exactly the same example. Most people who seek us out want to be heard. They are not looking for a sermon or our view on how to solve whatever they are going through. If only we trusted a little more in the innate ability of the person in front of us to face their challenges, we would increasingly realize that all we need is to take this to heart: if we want to do good, we must not make noise with our words.

Warm regards and all the best,

Rodrigo Baccaro

• P.S. This week’s VELA:
• What I was watching: Pain Hustlers. This film had a big impact on me. It has a striking ethical and moral dimension and is a must-see.
  – What I was listening to: Debate Capitalismo vs. Comunismo (Capitalism vs. Communism debate). Jordi Wild’s show is among the best on the web, and this debate is no small thing.
  – What I was reading: Elon Musk. My goal is to finish it by the end of January. This book has let me understand the genius of someone I admire for his determination and courage.
  – What I was learning: What is GLP-1 & How Does It Reduce Appetite & Promote Weight Loss? Andrew Huberman is one of my favorite podcasts, especially for how simply he explains concepts, particularly in medicine and hard science. In this episode he talks about yerba mate and its connection to weight loss.

Author: Rodrigo Baccaro

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